Relationship

Crime, including violent crime, relies upon opportunity. Sometimes a criminal creates, orchestrates, or takes advantage of an opportunity, and sometimes our actions and behaviors can facilitate an opportunity e.g. we leave a window open, that a burglar uses to break in to our house, etc. There is a theory concerning crime and opportunity called Routine Activity Theory (Cohen & Felson, 1979). Its basic premise is that, where a predatory crime occurs, an offender, and a likely target come together in a time and place without the presence of a capable guardian. The idea of a “capable guardian”, is specific to the context of the crime that is taking place. If the violent interaction was to take place in a pub/bar, a “capable guardian” that could prevent the incident from occurring, might be the large number of friends that you have with you, versus the lone offender, or the presence of door security personnel, etc. Although the theory doesn’t elaborate on it, the capable guardian, is judged or viewed to be capable based on the offender’s perceptions; the lone offender in the pub/bar, might not believe that your friends are “capable” of preventing an act of violence (a crime) against you, so in the context of the theory, if that were the case, they wouldn’t count as the “capable guardian”. What the theory really stresses though, is the idea of relationship, that there is a relationship between the offender and the victim, a relationship between the offender and the location, and a relationship between the victim and the location. In short, violence is about relationships.

One of the most over-looked areas of reality-based self-defense and self-protection is the relationship between the offender and the victim. Most women, when asked, understand that (statistically) they are most likely to be raped/sexually assaulted by someone they know, in their home or somebody else’s i.e. they will have a pre-defined relationship with their assailant, and both the offender and the victim will have a pre-defined relationship with the location. It is the “relationship” between the offender and the victim, which is key in such assaults, as it is this that the predatory individual uses to create the opportunity. However, often the “opportunities” that are taught in women’s self-defense classes don’t reflect this, with the attacker being presented as a stranger, who ambushes his victim, in an unfamiliar or irregular (based on the victim’s routine) location, such as a park, late at night. Neglecting to teach women how to manage the “relationship”, they have with a friend or acquaintance, who has adopted the role of a predator, in that situation (time and place), would be neglecting to address the most common types of sexual violence, that women are likely to face. Rather than focusing on physical solutions for dealing with predators who jump out from behind trees and ambush their victims, we should be directing our attention towards teaching social and verbal strategies, to deflect and disengage from the more likely situations, where a partner’s best friend, or a work acquaintance, turns up at the front door (place), at an unexpected time (time), with a story/reason why they need to be let in. Such predators work on our inability to manage our relationships with them in socially awkward situations and if we fail to address the “relationship” aspect of such violent assaults, we are not going to be effective in preventing these common attack scenarios.     

We also know that women are more likely to be physically assaulted by their partners than by a stranger. How do we address these situations and scenarios? Or are they simply too complex for us to provide solutions for? What are the potential consequences for a victim who fights back, but doesn’t leave their partner (relationship), or their home (location), because they may have children, or not have the financial resources to do so? I’m not suggesting that we become councilors and mental health professionals, but as those involved in reality-based self-defense, we need to teach to reality. It may be that we limit ourselves to teaching the predictive elements of potentially abusive relationships, so that those who may be at risk can understand the situation they are in, and have the opportunity to exit and disengage from the relationship before all parties have become too invested in it.

Violent offenders, even if they don’t know their victim, have a relationship with the locations they use. They will probably have a degree of familiarity with the location, understanding its life-cycle e.g. when it’s busy, and when it’s not. The rapist who targets his best friend’s partner, at her home, will know or find out the times when she will be alone. Certain criminals will choose locations near to where they live, others may choose locations some distance away, and may even leave their car in another location, so that it isn’t tied to, or associated with the crime scene e.g. a sexual assailant, whose MO (modus operandi), is to target lone women, in areas which are sparsely populated, may park their car some way away, so that they are not linked to that area at the time(s) when they commit their assault(s). In such instances, locations have relationships with locations; where the car is parked, although far away, will be located on a route which is both discrete (for instance there may be a lack of CCTV, which may in this context act as a Capable Guardian), and easily accessible. Both the crime scene location and the location where the car is parked, will be linked by a “channel”.

The location may also actively “draw” both the offender and the victim. In June of 2015, there was an attempted abduction of a 15-year old girl, at a retail outlet in New Hampshire (I wrote about this at the time in a blog article called “Real Life Predator Process”). The media expressed surprise that the assault occurred at 4:15 pm when the outlet was relatively busy. The offender knew that there would likely be   a large number of teenage girls at the mall, shopping after school was out. He knew that this location, would draw a certain population, as well as when this demographic was likely to be there. He understood the relationship that his potential victims had with this location, and this created opportunities for him. If his particular victim demographic was middle-aged women, he may have chosen a different time of day to visit the retail outlet, possibly choosing an earlier time in the day, when their children may have been more likely to be at school, giving them the opportunity to shop. If his demographic was women in their late teens and early twenties he may have chosen an entirely different location, and time, such as a city center, when the pubs and bars were closing. Predators go where their chosen prey are, and they have a good understanding of the relationship their victims have with certain locations.

From a predictive perspective, we should examine the relationships we have with certain locations, and understand the relationships that an offender might have with them, and at what times these may be. If we then find ourselves in this location, at this time, with someone – even if we have a prior relationship with them – we should at the very least be wary of their motive. Understanding the relationships we have with people, in certain locations, will allow us to understand the opportunities we may present for offenders, and we should develop tactics and strategies for dealing with them when this happens.