Not All Child Molesters Are The Same

In last week’s article I talked briefly about child sexual abductions. In this week’s article I want to look at child molestation and pedophilia, as there is often some confusion as to why different predatory individuals target children for sexual abuse, and the motivation(s) behind these offenses e.g. there can be a tendency to look at the sexual predation of children being committed by a singular type of predator who acts and operates in a universal manner. What surprises many people is that most sex-crimes against children and teenagers are not committed by pedophiles or hebephiles. Hebephiles are those adults who target pubescent, early adolescent children and teens, as opposed to pedophiles who target prepubescent children – there is some controversy as to whether this separate classification of those adults who are sexually attracted to teenagers, under the age of consent, is an attempt to “normalize” this type of sexual attraction, by separating it from the more general term of pedophilia. Statistically, the majority of child molestations are committed by those who are teleiophiles i.e. those who are “normally” and primarily attracted to adults – the stats would suggest that perhaps only 1 in 5 child molesters have a sexual predisposition for children (or more conservatively between a quarter and a half), with the majority of assaults being committed by incestuous adults who see their children as objects and possessions, and/or those who sexually take advantage of underage teens and children because opportunities and situations present themselves, etc. To those who are victimized by such predatory individuals, the motivation is perhaps unimportant but in order to be able to prevent our children being targeted, understanding that not all child molesters are the same is vitally important e.g. we may regard somebody as safe because they are married and in a seemingly active sexual relationship with their partner, and this may not necessarily be the case.

There are those pedophiles who genuinely believe that prepubescent children are able to engage in – and have the ability to consent to – sexual relations with adults. These individuals don’t believe that they are coercing and grooming children into relationships but are instead “awakening” and “encouraging” an innate sexual desire that they have, etc. For such persons, the law and society are out of touch, in not understanding that children should be allowed to be intimate partners with adults. Whereas many pedophiles understand that their urges aren’t natural, and fight against their emotions, these individuals don’t believe that their feelings are wrong, or that they are forcing children to engage in unnatural practices, etc. Such individuals – and their organizations, such as NAMBLA (North American Man/Boy Love Association) – are often involved in the debate(s) around the legal age of consent, and the attempts to lower it; using arguments that homosexuality was once criminalized in the same way that pedophilia is and yet society now recognizes gay marriage, and/or the fact that in certain indigenous cultures – and historically in others – children are recognized as being acceptable sexual partners, etc. Unfortunately, the discussions around lowering the age of consent are very current, and the voices to do so are loud and persistent; often gaining the ear of influential politicians and activists.

Mysopeds are pedophilic predators who molest children with the express desire of hurting – and possibly killing – them. These offenders tend to target children who are strangers to them, though in many cases both the victim and perpetrator have an awareness of each other e.g. the predator lives or possibly works in the neighborhood where the child lives, etc. Despite these individuals being classified as the most high-risk and dangerous of child molesters, they are certainly not the most prevalent, however we have every reason to be aware of their existence as their sadistic urges, often culminate in the killing of their victims. These are the types of offender that most martial arts schools’ “stranger danger” programs are envisaging dealing with - the individual who tries to coax a child out of a playground, etc. A relatively high-degree of planning might go into such abductions, with the offender bringing a change of clothing for the child (but usually not shoes, so these can be a valuable piece of information to pass on to security personnel), and even cutting/shaving the child’s hair during the abduction so that they are less easily identifiable, etc.  

The more common types of pedophilic offenders are the: “regressed” and “fixated” offenders. Regressed offenders see the child as a pseudo-adult and has usually been involved primarily in adult sexual relationships. Some type of precipitating and stressful event, such as a job loss or marriage failure results in feelings of inadequacy that are relieved through the abuse of the child. Those that commit these types of assault, usually appear to be well-adjusted individuals, with a healthy history of adult relationships who wouldn’t give us any reason to believe that they had developed a sexual interest in children. The fixated offender’s sexual desires have not developed beyond childhood and adolescence i.e. they have become “fixed” there. There isn’t any notable incident or event that caused this lack of maturation, they have simply aged into adulthood without developing an attraction for adults. In many cases, their offending starts during childhood/adolescence, with them targeting younger children, whilst they themselves are still children or teenagers – this is when they start their education into sexual abuse, and how to remain undetected, etc. A large part of this involves the importance of “shared secrets” between themselves and their victims, and the use of “dares” and “games”. Whilst, it may be uncomfortable for us to think of children and teenagers molesting other children it is an unfortunate reality, and the rules around sexual privacy that we teach our children concerning adults e.g. not allowing them to touch the body-parts that a bathing suit covers, etc., should be extended towards other children/teenagers as well.     

In this article I have discussed certain types and classifications of child-molesters and pedophiles, so that it can be understood that they are not a heterogeneous group, with a singular and common motivation; and neither do they all offend in the same way. In next weeks article, I want to look at the grooming processes that such offenders use, and how we can identify and prevent such incidents from happening.